Thursday, January 6, 2011

Conversations with my Daughter: the New Blog!

Dear Little Shit posts have moved! I figure I write enough in this segment it deserves it's own blog... that will help me maintain the initial purpose for MerciMilleFois as a blog of gratitude.

(Tell me what you think of the new blog! It's via Wordpress so it won't show up in Google-apps like Buzz unfortunately. But I wanted to try the look of WP).

Dear little shit: Pave your own way

-I wish there was a cookbook for life... recipes telling us exactly what to do. But I know, you're gonna say, 'How else will you learn?'.
-Actually, I wasn't going to say that. I was going to say you know better than anyone. It's the recipes you create yourself that are the best.

Catherine Zeta Jones, No Reservations

Dear Little Shit,

The quote above is from a terrible American remake. I hope one day you can watch the original German version because it had so many more layers and better acting. (Sorry Aaron Eckhart. Your portrayal of a dashing, charming chef is as contrived as George Bush playing the role of 'intelligent'.)

Anywho, task at hand. During my search for my purpose in life, I asked a lot of people why they're doing what they're doing and many answers started like this: "Well, I thought I wanted to be a ________, so that's why I'm here now. But looking back...". Why so many "but's"?

Oh I'll tell you why.

When you get to high school, people will start asking you what you want to be in life. When you start applying for college (which you will!... I mean... if you want to), teachers and relatives will ask what major you're applying for followed by, "Oh great, what are you going to do with a ________ degree?" (They'll definitely ask you this if you apply for a Liberal Arts degree, along with a hint of pity. Take your time answering. I have learned it's kind of fun watching their blank expressions try and hide the whirring in their heads while they search for the most distinguished possible profession you could reach with said Liberal Arts degree--it's always a Professor).

If you haven't got an answer for people, they always say, "Well you've got time". Bullshit. That clock was ticking the moment you were born, is what they're really thinking. And all through college the pressure will mount (if you choose to go to college...please at least go to college). But why, why at 18 are you expected to have a plan? Why should you be laying the foundation for your professional aspiration before you're mature enough to even vote? This is why there are so many 'buts'. Society has taught us to choose our pathways before we're old enough to know what all the career possibilities are; people are blindly choosing their way in life.

But I don't want you to go blindly.

There are SO many opportunities in this world. And you will have so many talents, whether you know it or not, that you can put to use doing something that will make you happy. My advice right now is to take your time. I might forget telling you this but hey, that's why I keep it in a blog--accountability! If you get stuck or lost, tell your daddy or me and maybe we can help you find something or at least help you experience things that will lead you to a passion. There's no one at the end of your twenties keeping track and judging you so don't feel the pressure to get it all sorted early. Your loved ones might worry for you, but we're also here supporting you. Be willing to try new things, be willing to open your mind, be willing to cut your losses, be willing to admit that everything worth doing will take a lot of work to get, and be willing to pave your own way.

(Just go to college though, ok?)